Feb28,2011

This week, I have a further understanding of the vertical and horizontal dimension of God and the earth that Kenny mentioned the week before.  Freedom exists when we are not our own. Freedom, kingdom and wisdom come when we look above. If we only walk horizontally with the world, then we will get stuck and struggle with our earthly problems all day long. But when we look above, all the things we need will be added to us in his way and his time. I believe that what God has prepared for me is the best, for he is a good God.

Before I came here, I would sometimes wander around with question marks in my mind: How come I keep pray for this and God didn’t open up this door for me? Why did God give me this when I asked for something else? Now I realized how blinded I was for I only looked at what are right in front of my eyes but ignored the bigger picture(the bigger plan that God has for me). This is definitely a big step in this Regen Journey. Praise the Lord for that.

Prayer of this week:

Dear Lord, lift up my eyes to heaven, and let your holy spirit be with me and live in me every moment in my life.

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Thank God for this big family. I will love each other and grow together.

Feb21, 2011

Last week has been a long week. A lot of things happened, in school and also back in dorm.  When everything is overwhelming, I do feel a little bit exhausted, both physically and spiritually. Fortunately, I have Holy Spirit to talk to when I feel weak. When I calm my heart and spend time with him, I can feel that I am not alone. Actually, I even felt delightful and grateful for the things that are not so pleasant. I believe it is an opportunity that God gave me to spend more time with him and to practice what’s been taught in class. The best thing is not when someone tells you that he’s the best comforter and healer, but to actually experience it. I feel that forgiving is not as hard as before when I have Holy Spirit empowers me.  Just like what Steve said:” life here is also a part of the lesson”. Once again I realize that REGEN is not just a school that brings knowledge, but a journey that breaks you down and restores you completely—a transformation. Lord, thank you for that.

And on Thursday, when Kenny was talking about stepping out the boat, I realized that God wants us to be a disciple, not just a religious person who sits around in churches. Devil is not afraid of chairs or buildings. But it takes courage to get off the chairs and go out as Jesus did. It requires SURRENDER.

But it is the time now to step out of the boat. I know I will walk on water when my eyes are focus on Jesus.

Feb13, 2011

This week has been absolutely amazing. With Tony’s teaching and help, I started to build a closer relationship with the Holy Spirit. In fact, most of my prayers before were focused on God and Jesus, but not much on Holy Spirit. Now I realize what a significant role Holy Spirit plays in my life.  He is actually a key to discover my identity and destiny. The idea of seeing him as a person is also very helpful. When I wake up in the morning, I would say Good Morning to Holy Spirit; and say Good night to him before I go to bed; or even have a date with Holy Spirit. I can feel that he is right beside me and is always with me. This is absolutely fantastic. So now I can allow him to truly be my counselor, my teacher, my guider and protector.

Another highlight of the week is that I have received the gift of spiritual language AGAIN! Or I should say, God reactivated my spiritual language. I received this gift from God in the 9-day Regen classes last summer. However, I did not know how to start a spiritual prayer or how to practice after I got back to Vancouver. So I barely spoke in tongues except a couple times during some conferences. So I am really grateful how God loves me so much, in which he would give me this gift again when I desire for it. Tony said something in class that was really stuck in my head: What you have so far is basically what you want in your heart.

Right now, I just want to tell Holy Spirit: “I want you more.”

PS: Praise the Lord! Rachel just told me she will stay for the entire 6 month^^ . Haleluya!!

Feb06,2011

Speaker this week: Donna, an amazing woman of God who is full of love and passion. Her love flowed into us with her embrace.

One of the most impressive lessons this week is how to read using images and imagination. Through the several examples Donna gave us in the class, I learned how to make the words jump off the page. And I realized how powerful it is to read the Bible this way. When I closed my eyes, thinking about the words, I could actually see the images that are flowing in my mind. I could hear the sound and sense God`s presence. That is really amazing! At moment, I realized that is how I should read my Bible from now on.  Using this method, I can read my Bible not only with my eyes and mind, but also with my heart, my soul and every other senses that God gave me. I really enjoy how these words are becoming vivid images that keep replaying in my mind. This really helps me to remind myself that his words are lively and real.

Dear heavenly Father:

You brought light into darkness; You brought heaven down to Earth.
You are the light, love and hope.
So never leave me alone any more, father. Let your holy spirit lives in me. So I would walk in your path.
Teach me, oh Lord, how to love you more and more, each and every day.

Jan 30, 2011

“Let it rain. Let it rain. Let it rain. Let it rain on us.”

Kenny was playing his guitar and singing on the stage. Everyone in the conference was lifting up their arms and praising the Lord. That moment, I could feel the rain of mercy was pouring on me. I felt something flew out of my eyes and went down of my cheeks. I knew, it was joy.

The conference this week was an amazing path that God led us on to in the REGEN journey. Unfortunately, as volunteers, we couldn’t hear the entire message. But it is ok. Even just greeting and blessing the people who came in and out, I felt plenty of love and joy that were continuously  filled in me. In addition to this, I have also experienced one of the most amazing moments in my life- the Fire tunnel. This was actually the first time I ever experience or even just witness this amount of people got manifested simultaneously. It was so awesome to see the power of the Holy Spirit working on so many people at once. Serving as a catcher also allowed us to experience the Holy Spirit on another level.

Besides the conference, the second week’s class also has a significant impact on me. I finally found out why some people got stuck in their worldly problems. They went to church, got prayers and healing. But the problems or sins came back to them. This is because people are dealing with the symptoms, not the roots. And now, I can start to discover the roots of my sins and problems.

A further step to find my identity… my destiny…

Jan 22, 2011

My soul yearns, even faints, for the courts of the Lord; my heart and my flesh cry out for the living God. —Psalm 84:2

With a trembling heart and an eager soul, I began this journey with my heavenly father. The first week of school is filled with excitements and passion. Exciting about to be transformed and having a closer relationship with God; Nervous about the challenges and the “shakings” that I am going to experience. But when it comes to worshiping and praying, the fullness of the Holy Spirit just washed all my concerns away like a rain falling down from heaven. At that moment, I knew this place is a community that is filled with God’s presence, which would equip me and transform me with the Father’s right hand sustaining me.

This is the first time I realize how important it is to value and see ourselves in God’s perspective. It is really amazing to know that God love me just the way I am. It’s not how good I performed to win God’s love. It is like a giant wonderful gift falling down from heaven and I simply choose to receive. Every single cell in my body wants to dance in joy after hearing this message. Recall the days I tried so hard to please the world and tried to be “perfect”, I realized that it was a wrong path that would lead to disappointment and shame. 

In this dwelling place, I will put all the old stuff away, and focus my eyes on my Lord, the king of kings.

And I know, it’s just a beginning…